Do not read whilst eating
also read this...
1 week ago
Sunday 28 February 2010
Saturday 27 February 2010
Laws
Law of Mechanical Repair:
After your hands become coated with grease,
your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.
Law of Gravity:
Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped,
will roll to the least accessible corner.
Law of Probability:
The probability of being watched . . .
. . . is directly proportional . . .
. . . . . . to the stupidity of your act
Law of Random Numbers:
If you dial a wrong number,
you never get a busy signal . . .
. . . and someone always answers.
Law of the Alibi:
If you tell the boss you were late for work because . . .
you had a flat tire; the very next morning you will have a flat tire.
Variation Law:
If you change lines (or traffic lanes),
the one you were in will always move faster
than the one to which you switched . . . (works every time).
Law of the Bath:
When the body is fully immersed in water . . .
. . . the telephone rings.
Law of Close Encounters:
The probability of meeting someone you know . . .
increases dramatically . . .
when you are with someone . . .
.. . . . you don't want to be seen with.
Law of the Result:
When you try to prove to someone . . .
. . . that a machine won't work . . .
. . . . . . it will work fine.
Law of Biomechanics:
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional . . .
. . . to the reach needed to scratch it.
Law of the Theater and Hockey Arena:
At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle,
always arrive last. They are the ones who will leave their seats
several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early,
before the end of the performance or the game is over.
The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move once,
have long gangly legs or big bellies, and stay to the bitter end
of the performance. The aisle people are also very surly folk.
The Coffee Law :
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee . . .
your boss will ask you to do something which will last . . .
. . . until the coffee is cold.
Murphy's Law of Lockers:
If there are only two people in a locker room . . .
. . . they will have adjacent lockers.
Law of Physical Surfaces :
The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich . . .
landing face down on a floor . . . are directly correlated . . .
. . . to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.
Law of Logical Argument:
Anything is possible . . .
. . if you don't know what you are talking about.
Brown's Law of Physical Appearance:
If the clothes fit, they're ugly.
Oliver's Law of Public Speaking :
A closed mouth gathers no feet.
Wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy:
As soon as you find . . .
. . . a product that you really like . . .
. . . . . they will stop making it..
Doctors' Law :
If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor,
by the time you get there you'll feel better.
But, don't make an appointment, and you'll stay sick.
After your hands become coated with grease,
your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.
Law of Gravity:
Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped,
will roll to the least accessible corner.
Law of Probability:
The probability of being watched . . .
. . . is directly proportional . . .
. . . . . . to the stupidity of your act
Law of Random Numbers:
If you dial a wrong number,
you never get a busy signal . . .
. . . and someone always answers.
Law of the Alibi:
If you tell the boss you were late for work because . . .
you had a flat tire; the very next morning you will have a flat tire.
Variation Law:
If you change lines (or traffic lanes),
the one you were in will always move faster
than the one to which you switched . . . (works every time).
Law of the Bath:
When the body is fully immersed in water . . .
. . . the telephone rings.
Law of Close Encounters:
The probability of meeting someone you know . . .
increases dramatically . . .
when you are with someone . . .
.. . . . you don't want to be seen with.
Law of the Result:
When you try to prove to someone . . .
. . . that a machine won't work . . .
. . . . . . it will work fine.
Law of Biomechanics:
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional . . .
. . . to the reach needed to scratch it.
Law of the Theater and Hockey Arena:
At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle,
always arrive last. They are the ones who will leave their seats
several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early,
before the end of the performance or the game is over.
The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move once,
have long gangly legs or big bellies, and stay to the bitter end
of the performance. The aisle people are also very surly folk.
The Coffee Law :
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee . . .
your boss will ask you to do something which will last . . .
. . . until the coffee is cold.
Murphy's Law of Lockers:
If there are only two people in a locker room . . .
. . . they will have adjacent lockers.
Law of Physical Surfaces :
The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich . . .
landing face down on a floor . . . are directly correlated . . .
. . . to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.
Law of Logical Argument:
Anything is possible . . .
. . if you don't know what you are talking about.
Brown's Law of Physical Appearance:
If the clothes fit, they're ugly.
Oliver's Law of Public Speaking :
A closed mouth gathers no feet.
Wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy:
As soon as you find . . .
. . . a product that you really like . . .
. . . . . they will stop making it..
Doctors' Law :
If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor,
by the time you get there you'll feel better.
But, don't make an appointment, and you'll stay sick.
Friday 26 February 2010
Easy money
Funk all those “How to become a Millionaire” books – I’ve got a blinder that’ll cost you no more that 2 rats and will make you a mint in a night. All you need for this is a group of mates, a Snickers bar and half a pint of cider. That’s your only investment. Here’s what to do.
So, you’re in a pub chilling with your pals – a warm Snicker in your pocket and half a pint in your hand. Go to the toilet, drop the chocolate bar in to the half-pint and place the glass on the shelf above the urinals. Return to your pals.
Within a few moments nature will call and one of the group will need to go for a piss. Thirty seconds later he returns in a shock “Some dirty scrubber and coiled one in a glass and pissed all over it!!”. (The Snickers has begun to stagnate and mix with the cider and a few peanuts are bobbing on the top – Artwork!)
Go and retrieve your concoction, slam it on the table and in your half-cooked state deliver the line “£100 and ill knock it back”
Out comes the money, down goes the food and drink and you’re not only £100 better off but also a mad-f**k in your mates minds! BOOM….Seeeeeya, on to the next pub…Wednesday 24 February 2010
Spotting Liars
EYE CONTACT: A bad liar feels uncomfortable with deception and may use tactics such as rubbing their eyes to avoid eye contact. If a pal does this while they're telling you about how fit last night's date was, you can assume they're being dishonest.
The opposite of avoiding eye contact is the fixed stare and this can also be a giveaway. This liar is determined to convince you they are telling the truth. If they hold eye contact for more than SIX seconds be suspicious about what they are telling you.
The fact liars can't look victims in the eyes is a myth. A liar often overcompensates eye contact in an attempt to convince the victim they're not making things up.
WHERE THEY LOOK: When right-handed people are lying, they tend to look right. With left-handers it's the other way round.
WHAT THEY SAY: How liars answer questions can also expose them and you should look out for what is called "a contraction". So for example if a truthful person is asked: "Did you falsify this report?" they will reply "No, I didn't."
Whereas a liar will have no time to think about the process and simply mirror the questioner's language and stretch out the sentence, such as: "No, I did not do that."
HOW THEY STAND: Liars will tend to cross their ankles or arms - but a lot of people are aware of that body language and will try to keep a more open posture to put victims off the scent.
Observing a person's stance when they're standing up can be a good indicator. A liar may deliberately position their posture at a right angle to avoid standing in an open position. If they do, they could be telling porkies.
WATCH THEIR HANDS: When kids tell a lie, they will usually cover their mouth and this is worth remembering.
Any kind of gesture from someone's hands towards the upper chest, face or head area - like scratching their head - can mean untruths.
Also, if somebody is holding something like a coffee cup or folder between themselves and you, watch out. They could be using it to create a subconscious barrier to hide behind.
WATCH THEIR LIPS: People's lips will go pale in times of stress. And if they are red-faced or white as a sheet while speaking to you this can be a giveaway too. This happens in response to the body's natural flight or fight response in times of pressure, which can be sparked by lying.
TWITCHES: Liars often twitch which can be one of the easiest signs to spot. Often it's the liar's eyelids which twitch or it could be a tiny muscle in the cheek or neck.
Males have an area at the bottom of the nose which actually twitches when we know we haven't told the truth.
WHEN WOMEN LIE: The biggest girlie giveaway is blushing and can be a sign your missus is lying.
Sunday 21 February 2010
More Muslim hatred in Sweden
It's all so sad, this . Naivety, sloth, ignorance on behalf of Western governments. Read....and weep
Saturday 20 February 2010
Friday 19 February 2010
Have yourself a cultural week
Saturday
The Philanthropist Submit review ‘Bourgeois comedy’ by Christopher Hampton. Oxford dons continue sexual and semantic squabbles against a backdrop of political murder and anarchy.
7.30pm, £5(£4)
Burton Taylor Studio (www.burtontaylor.co.uk), Gloucester Street, (between Beaumont Street and Gloucester Green), Oxford OX1 2BN; Tel. 01865 305305.
Sunday
Drugs, Science and Politics
Tuesday
IMPerium The Oxford Imps In their most ambitious project to date, the Oxford Imps improvise an entirely new world each night, in which even the most minor of characters has a story to tell.
7.30pm, £5(£4)
Burton Taylor Studio (www.burtontaylor.co.uk), Gloucester Street, (between Beaumont Street and Gloucester Green), Oxford OX1 2BN; Tel. 01865 305305.
Wednesday
Yawn Edward Fish is a great talker, a bad sleeper, predator, automobile enthusiast, admirer of Jane Austen's heroines. Tonight he has to entertain Rachel. And she will like it. Suitable for 12+.
7.30pm, £9 (£7)
OFS Studio (www.OFSstudio.org.uk), 40 George Street OX1 2AQ; Tel. 0844 847 2360.
Thursday
IMPerium The Oxford Imps In their most ambitious project to date, the Oxford Imps improvise an entirely new world each night, in which even the most minor of characters has a story to tell.
7.30pm, £5(£4)
Burton Taylor Studio (www.burtontaylor.co.uk), Gloucester Street, (between Beaumont Street and Gloucester Green), Oxford OX1 2BN; Tel. 01865 305305.
Friday
The Philanthropist Submit review ‘Bourgeois comedy’ by Christopher Hampton. Oxford dons continue sexual and semantic squabbles against a backdrop of political murder and anarchy.
7.30pm, £5(£4)
Burton Taylor Studio (www.burtontaylor.co.uk), Gloucester Street, (between Beaumont Street and Gloucester Green), Oxford OX1 2BN; Tel. 01865 305305.
Sunday
Drugs, Science and Politics
Tuesday
Dr Stephen Law - "What's It All About Then? Life, the Universe, and Everything"
- Wadham College, Moser Theatre, OX1 3PN (directions)
IMPerium The Oxford Imps In their most ambitious project to date, the Oxford Imps improvise an entirely new world each night, in which even the most minor of characters has a story to tell.
7.30pm, £5(£4)
Burton Taylor Studio (www.burtontaylor.co.uk), Gloucester Street, (between Beaumont Street and Gloucester Green), Oxford OX1 2BN; Tel. 01865 305305.
Wednesday
Yawn Edward Fish is a great talker, a bad sleeper, predator, automobile enthusiast, admirer of Jane Austen's heroines. Tonight he has to entertain Rachel. And she will like it. Suitable for 12+.
7.30pm, £9 (£7)
OFS Studio (www.OFSstudio.org.uk), 40 George Street OX1 2AQ; Tel. 0844 847 2360.
Facebook group: http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=294536615038&ref=ts
Synopsis: Edward Fish is a great talker, a bad sleeper, predator, automobile enthusiast, an admirer of Jane Austen’s heroines and most importantly Constance’s husband. Tonight, though, he will have to entertain Rachel, Constance’s old school friend. And she will like it. As supper approaches, Edward rehearses for his final charm-assault.
Thursday
IMPerium The Oxford Imps In their most ambitious project to date, the Oxford Imps improvise an entirely new world each night, in which even the most minor of characters has a story to tell.
7.30pm, £5(£4)
Burton Taylor Studio (www.burtontaylor.co.uk), Gloucester Street, (between Beaumont Street and Gloucester Green), Oxford OX1 2BN; Tel. 01865 305305.
Friday
13:00
Poetry Workshop
- Lincoln College, Lower Lecture Room, OX1 3DR (directions)
Everyone is welcome to come and share their atheist/agnostic/irreverent/theological poetry and offer sensitive, constructive feedback - or just bring your favourite piece of Godless verse along to read and discuss. We only ask that you bring something to read (a short piece of prose is fine) and if at all possible around six printed copies so we can read along. Open to writers of all ages and levels of experience. There is no need to register in advance.
20:00
Samantha Stein, Camp Quest UK Director - "Public Perceptions of Atheism"
- Wadham College, Moser Theatre, OX1 3PN (directions)
Founder and director of Camp Quest UK Samantha Stein will be delivering a talk on "Public Perceptions of Atheism".
Show Bio...
Show Bio...
21:30
Comedian Iszi Lawrence - "The Experiences of an Awkward Atheist"
- Bar Copa Function Room, OX1 2AU (directions)
Stand-up comedian Iszi Lawrence will be performing a set discussing "the experiences of an awkward atheist". The set will draw on material from her first hour show, the Time Out-recommended "Matter of Tact"Recent short stories published in The Sunday Times Magazine:
Lionel Shriver - Negative equity
Targets
This may be interesting for maths students.
This is a target to beat - especially for Oxbridge applicants!
This is a target to beat - especially for Oxbridge applicants!
Wednesday 17 February 2010
Tuesday 16 February 2010
Monday 15 February 2010
Sunday 14 February 2010
Thursday 11 February 2010
Tuesday 9 February 2010
Sunday 7 February 2010
Economics
...students like Stella, Veronika and others....
Clarendon Lectures - Economics Oxford University Press The Biological Foundations of Economic and Social Behaviour by Ernst Fehr.
email: michael.burt@oup.com / Tel. 01865 353268
5.30pm, free
St. Cross Building, Manor Road, Oxford
F-R-E-E
Clarendon Lectures - Economics Oxford University Press The Biological Foundations of Economic and Social Behaviour by Ernst Fehr.
email: michael.burt@oup.com / Tel. 01865 353268
5.30pm, free
St. Cross Building, Manor Road, Oxford
F-R-E-E
Saturday 6 February 2010
Friday 5 February 2010
Thursday 4 February 2010
LSE Lectures
LSE Lectures - visit here for videos
Look for the December lecture by Raj Patel.
two reasons:
a. it's a clear and well thought through lecture
b. Because of this.....
Look for the December lecture by Raj Patel.
two reasons:
a. it's a clear and well thought through lecture
b. Because of this.....
Wednesday 3 February 2010
Tuesday 2 February 2010
Think faster
Can YOU imagine a simple self-development tool...... That can help you THINK FASTER and SHARPER than EVER BEFORE?
DOUBLE your ability to learn. THINK like a genius. RELEASE stress. BREEZE through your studies. UNLOCK hidden ability. SOLVE problems quickly.
Well, it's ALL POSSIBLE - when you discover the Brain Evolution System.
The Brain Evolution System is a simple, six-CD program for helping you MASTER your BRAIN - by literally CHANGING your BRAINWAVES.
It works by using special sounds to help influence your brainwaves -which helps to change your mood, your focus, your stress levels, your confidence - and MUCH MORE!
You'll find yourself enjoying LIMITLESS ENERGY and MOTIVATION. Your emotional baggage will simply DISAPPEAR. Your relationships will IMPROVE. Your confidence will SOAR. You'll experience more CREATIVE RUSHES. You'll become IMMUNE to worries and tension.
And all because you spend JUST 30 MINUTES listening to a simple audio recording.
Would you like to learn more about what's being called "the most powerful self-development technology on earth" ... ?
Then click on THIS LINK and download YOUR copy for JUST $0.00 ... TODAY!
http://clicks.aweber.com/y/ct/?l=DLdOp&m=JL9dZXDCMbU05D&b=Won8swTx02FRBYc_F.6k1A
DOUBLE your ability to learn. THINK like a genius. RELEASE stress. BREEZE through your studies. UNLOCK hidden ability. SOLVE problems quickly.
Well, it's ALL POSSIBLE - when you discover the Brain Evolution System.
The Brain Evolution System is a simple, six-CD program for helping you MASTER your BRAIN - by literally CHANGING your BRAINWAVES.
It works by using special sounds to help influence your brainwaves -which helps to change your mood, your focus, your stress levels, your confidence - and MUCH MORE!
You'll find yourself enjoying LIMITLESS ENERGY and MOTIVATION. Your emotional baggage will simply DISAPPEAR. Your relationships will IMPROVE. Your confidence will SOAR. You'll experience more CREATIVE RUSHES. You'll become IMMUNE to worries and tension.
And all because you spend JUST 30 MINUTES listening to a simple audio recording.
Would you like to learn more about what's being called "the most powerful self-development technology on earth" ... ?
Then click on THIS LINK and download YOUR copy for JUST $0.00 ... TODAY!
http://clicks.aweber.com/y/ct/?l=DLdOp&m=JL9dZXDCMbU05D&b=Won8swTx02FRBYc_F.6k1A
Monday 1 February 2010
Wake your brain up!
It's simple: close your eyes and visualize in your mind that your head is about one inch bigger all around than it is.
Actually *see* this in your mind's eye.
If you hold this image in your head for about 30 seconds straight it sends your nervous system a signal to pump more oxygen to your brain.
It's a bizarre "brain hack," but it's actually measurable via CT scan.
People who try it usually experience a sense of heightened alertness on the first try. (if it didn't work - try a few times - really *see* your head as being larger in your mind's eye)
Another way to awaken your brain is to train a "dormant" area.
For example, most of us don't know how to draw - yet if we were to train ourselves to (and it's quite easy as demonstrated here ...
http://www.simpleology.com/courses/drawing/
...) we would see a dramatic improvement in our alertness, our confidence, our communication ...
Most people go through life thinking that we either "have it or we don't."
For the most part - that's nonsense.
To use the example of drawing again, for the 99.9% of the population that doesn't know how to draw, it's not that they don't have any talent - it's just that they haven't been given proper instruction.
This part of your brain is "lying dormant" only to be awakened by a good teacher.
Awakening the various parts of your brain that are untapped is deeply rewarding on a great many levels.
Actually *see* this in your mind's eye.
If you hold this image in your head for about 30 seconds straight it sends your nervous system a signal to pump more oxygen to your brain.
It's a bizarre "brain hack," but it's actually measurable via CT scan.
People who try it usually experience a sense of heightened alertness on the first try. (if it didn't work - try a few times - really *see* your head as being larger in your mind's eye)
Another way to awaken your brain is to train a "dormant" area.
For example, most of us don't know how to draw - yet if we were to train ourselves to (and it's quite easy as demonstrated here ...
http://www.simpleology.com/
...) we would see a dramatic improvement in our alertness, our confidence, our communication ...
Most people go through life thinking that we either "have it or we don't."
For the most part - that's nonsense.
To use the example of drawing again, for the 99.9% of the population that doesn't know how to draw, it's not that they don't have any talent - it's just that they haven't been given proper instruction.
This part of your brain is "lying dormant" only to be awakened by a good teacher.
Awakening the various parts of your brain that are untapped is deeply rewarding on a great many levels.
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